Building a God-Honoring Marriage

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Marriage isn’t easy.

John and I haven’t had a perfect marriage—far from it. We’ve faced disagreements, seasons of busyness, moments of disappointment, and times when we had to choose to fight for our marriage instead of against each other.

But looking back, I can say this with confidence: it’s worth it.

Love, grace, and commitment have carried us through the hard moments. And when we’ve put God first, we’ve found the strength to keep going.

Here’s what we’ve learned (and are still learning) about building a God-honoring marriage:

10+ Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage

Greet each other warmly
A hug, a kiss, a smile—these small gestures after a long day say, “You matter to me.”

Hold off when cranky
Don’t use a bad mood as an excuse to point out flaws. Wait for peace before tackling tension.

Talk about expectations
Discuss your needs honestly. Do you expect home-cooked meals, quiet evenings, shared chores, or regular time with extended family? Talk now—avoid surprises later.

Spend time with God—together and alone
Read the Bible. Pray together. Grow your individual faith and invite your spouse into it.
“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
—Ecclesiastes 4:12

Do something daily to bring them joy
Leave a note, make coffee, offer a compliment—simple acts, big impact.

Follow through on their requests
Write down what your spouse asks you to do. Then do it—cheerfully.

Guard your spouse’s reputation
Never vent about them to friends, family, or even your children.
“Love… keeps no record of wrongs.”
—1 Corinthians 13:5

Keep your thoughts pure
Don’t let comparison, fantasy, or emotional distance creep in.
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
—Proverbs 4:23

Make time for fun
Laugh. Dance. Go on dates. Marriage is more than survival—it’s a chance to delight in one another again and again.

Pray for each other daily
Bring your spouse before God. Ask Him to bless, strengthen, and guide them.

Real Advice from Real Wives

My Facebook community offered timeless advice for younger married selves. Here are just a few of their golden nuggets:

• “It doesn’t matter how the towels are folded.” — Pam
• “Look to Christ to fulfill your needs.” — Jamie
• “Respect him. Always, always respect him.” — Jenny
• “Expect your husband to be human. Grace is a constant companion in marriage.” — Meg
• “Don’t take your hubby for granted. Kiss him goodnight every night.” — Sarah
• “Different isn’t wrong!” — Laura
• “Pray together. It’s hard at first but brings you closer.” — Kari

For the Not-Yet-Married: Start Practicing Now

If you’re not married yet, don’t skip this advice—practice it now. Learning to pray for your future spouse, cultivate a heart of grace, and grow in communication will bless your future relationship more than you know.

Start with this powerful resource:
I wrote Praying for Your Future Husband with my good friend Robin Jones Gunn as a guide for single women who want to prepare their hearts and invite God into their love story—before it begins.

This post is your practice list. Start becoming the kind of person who will build a God-centered marriage when the time comes.

Scripture to Encourage Your Marriage

• “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
  —Ephesians 4:2
• “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
  —Ephesians 5:21
• “Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.”
  —Romans 12:9
• “Do everything in love.”
  —1 Corinthians 16:14
• “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
  —Mark 10:9

A Prayer for Married Couples

Heavenly Father,
Thank You for the beautiful gift of marriage. Teach us to love each other with patience, humility, and joy. Help us speak kindly, listen deeply, and forgive quickly. Remind us that we are not each other’s enemy but partners in the journey. Strengthen our bond and fill our hearts with grace—especially in hard moments. Guide us to pray together, laugh often, and walk in step with Your Spirit.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Additional Resources

Journal Through the Bible in 2025

Have you ever wanted to read through the Bible but found yourself giving up? Or even worse, you read the chapters and at the end question how they apply to your life. Tricia Goyer understands. For years she felt frustrated that she couldn’t stick to her commitment to read God’s Word all the way through. Things changed when she found a doable plan and wrote out a daily prayer. Tricia’s heart changed. Her life did, too.

God can bring real transformation into your heart and life when you daily commit to reading your Bible and praying through God’s Word. Praying through the Bible in One Year offers a guided reading plan and a daily prayer starter to help you make God’s Word applicable to your life. Discover the inspiration for real-life transformation.

Purchase a copy of Praying Through the Bible in One Year HERE.